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I let myself down, but more importantly I let down my school and my town. I lost respect from a lot of people. <br> How does one deal with something like this? I tried thinking of positive things to boost my morale, but I was unable to sooth the pain in my soul. I remember the night of the playoff game, standing outside the stadium in the pouring rain. I found myself wishing that I could go back in time to prevent my superior mess-up. People would walk by and whisper things. They didn t know, but I could hear what they were saying. These things were all true, but how could I change what I already did? As the game ended and the stands finished emptying, I walked over to the gate and stared at the field for a while. Full of hurt, I walked back to my house and went to bed. I didn t sleep at all that night, all I remember is thinking back on the season and how far the team succeeded. <br> I honestly believe that I have learned from my mistake. I have no desire for any alcohol at all. There are still people who despise me because of what I had done, but I have learned to live with that. I just hope that I have showed people what it means to lose a part of themselves, and how much it hurts to wreck your own dreams. I would also like to send my deepest apologies to everyone, especially my teammates. <br> The other day I was asked about the whole situation and if I learned from it. I knew the answer and so did this individual. Then, as I walked away, I was told that I was not the only one who learned from it, so did everyone else. Please think twice before you do something stupid, and never forget your dreams.<br>Note: This athlete went on to wrestle and won the State Championship at 190 defeating two wrestlers in the tournament that had defeated him during the season.<br>$1,600.00 for their award. The point system is based on attendance, leadership and our evaluation.<br>We also have an award for the most improved player, the best free agent and the best rehab player. All the money that is awarded goes against our salary cap. There is a big time pride factor that goes on. A lot of times, the veterans who win will give it to others.<br>It is amazing to see grown men yelling and screaming like high school kids. When Larry Allen Benched 600 pounds, everyone went crazy. <br>Dexter Coakley, who is 5-10, 250 pounds from Appalachian State, made the All-Rookie team but he wanted more size. In one year, Dexter improved his forty time from 4.35 down to 4.28 while increasing his body weight by 15 pounds. 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